UA-198543153-1 158 - Hollywood Bowl - 5 Star Review - Review That Review with Chelsey and Trey

Episode 158

158: Hollywood Bowl - 5 Star Review

The Queens rate and review a 5 Star Amazon Review for the Hollywood institution that is The Hollywood Bowl! Trey lodges a complaint about the calculator conundrum asking, "are we always starting over?!" before the Queens discuss the sentimental value of yearbooks. Queendom Question: Do you remember Kinko's?

(01:19) Lodge a Complaint!

(05:01) Review

(21:54) Exclusive Offer

(25:07) My Royal Highness

(30:22) On This Week's After Show Pod

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---

Review That Review is an independent podcast.  Executive Produced by Trey Gerrald and Chelsey Donn with editing and sound design by Trey Gerrald.  Cover art designed by LogoVora, voiceover talents by Eva Kaminsky, and our theme song was written by Joe Kinosian and sung by Natalie Weiss.

Transcript
CHELSEY DONN:

Small quick tangent that I just want to talk about and address quickly, quickly, quickly, Speaking of nerds, Trey, you did me dirty on the editing of the episode, you really, I don't know if you guys will listen, It's several episodes back at this point,

TREY GERRALD:

it's the Calculator episode!

VOICEOVER:

Everybody's got an opinion, Every Californian and Virginian, It's so hard to tell who to trust and who to ignore, Someone's gotta settle the score., Trey and Chelsey will help you choose, Whose views win which ones lose, Online haters are coming for you, Baby, it's time to Review That Review!,

CHELSEY DONN:

hello,

TREY GERRALD:

and hello, listeners.

TREY GERRALD:

Welcome to Review That Review.

TREY GERRALD:

We are the podcast that is dedicated to reviewing.

CHELSEY DONN:

Reviews!

CHELSEY DONN:

And that's

TREY GERRALD:

That's Chelsey Donn.

CHELSEY DONN:

Trey Gerrald!

TREY GERRALD:

And together as an entity, we are

VOICEOVER:

The Review Queens,

CHELSEY DONN:

But Trey, first, before we get started, I gotta know, you want to let something off your chest?

CHELSEY DONN:

It is Time Queen, too, Is that cool?

VOICEOVER:

Ledge a complaint,

TREY GERRALD:

Why Thank You.

TREY GERRALD:

First, how often do you use a calculator?

CHELSEY DONN:

Like with some regularity.

TREY GERRALD:

But do you use the one on your iPhone?

CHELSEY DONN:

Yes.

TREY GERRALD:

Okay, so it's different on the iPhone.

TREY GERRALD:

So I'm talking about standard like 3D calculators that exist in

TREY GERRALD:

the world.

CHELSEY DONN:

haven't got having used one of those in a long time.

TREY GERRALD:

Okay, well, maybe you'll have a memory of this.

TREY GERRALD:

So at my place of employment, I have to use a printing calculator where it's like the spool of paper and it prints, right?

TREY GERRALD:

Today, I need to lodge a complaint against why do these calculators have two different clear buttons where one It's a C and one is a C E and if I just like accidentally put the decimal in the wrong place or oh Oh, no, my fat finger push seven and I meant to push three.

TREY GERRALD:

I don't know which one deletes Everything and which one deletes?

TREY GERRALD:

Oh, no the little typo I just did no matter how many times I've ever been in the situation where I'm like shit I don't retain which one from the previous time, and they're even different colors.

TREY GERRALD:

So I could just be like, okay, I have to remember that this red one means this, and this one means

TREY GERRALD:

this.

TREY GERRALD:

One is like a backspace in

TREY GERRALD:

terms of a typing keyboard, like, oh, this is erasing an error,

TREY GERRALD:

versus clearing all.

TREY GERRALD:

Like it could, it could be C A.

TREY GERRALD:

I don't know the difference between CE

CHELSEY DONN:

I mean, I feel like B, backspace, right?

CHELSEY DONN:

Like that makes more sense.

CHELSEY DONN:

Can

TREY GERRALD:

can we, can we like, get a little clarity on that?

TREY GERRALD:

So,

CHELSEY DONN:

get a little clarity on the clarity?

TREY GERRALD:

Googled really quick

TREY GERRALD:

before we recorded because I wanted to see if it's, if it's like that on the iPhone and it's not.

TREY GERRALD:

So then I was like, okay, what is, what are the clear buttons?

TREY GERRALD:

So, I found out.

TREY GERRALD:

CE means clear entry.

TREY GERRALD:

And C means clear So I, no, no, it just says clear.

TREY GERRALD:

So I don't know which one means what, which one is the entry?

TREY GERRALD:

Because they're all an entry.

TREY GERRALD:

So is C E erasing your most previous entry?

TREY GERRALD:

And C is clear.

TREY GERRALD:

Like, don't you think it would be clear all?

TREY GERRALD:

Like that seems, that seems more clear.

TREY GERRALD:

So why wouldn't it, why wouldn't it be?

TREY GERRALD:

Like, oh, clear versus clear all instead of clear entry and clear.

TREY GERRALD:

I don't know.

TREY GERRALD:

I know it's a little like niche cause not everyone is typing on calculators and also like tax season has passed, but obviously people use calculators a lot with taxes and when you're adding up figures.

TREY GERRALD:

So when you have like 17 entries deep and then you like make a little error and it's like, if I choose the wrong path,

CHELSEY DONN:

yep,

TREY GERRALD:

It gives me so much agita.

TREY GERRALD:

I don't even really know how to verbalize it succinctly, but that's my complaint today.

TREY GERRALD:

Whoever is in charge of calculators,

TREY GERRALD:

I don't know, like, is it,

TREY GERRALD:

like, Malcolm Calculator?

TREY GERRALD:

Like, did your great great great grandfather come up with this?

TREY GERRALD:

Was it like the beads thing back in the day?

TREY GERRALD:

Like, can we just fix it so that I don't

TREY GERRALD:

end up

CHELSEY DONN:

Sigmund

TREY GERRALD:

all my work?

CHELSEY DONN:

it might have been Sigmund,

TREY GERRALD:

that's my complaint.

CHELSEY DONN:

I hear you, I think that the way we could make this a little bit more universal is really just to say anytime you are using a calculator and then you accidentally enter the wrong number or you accidentally press the clear button or back, so like whatever it is.

CHELSEY DONN:

Now you gotta start

TREY GERRALD:

Yes, I hate

CHELSEY DONN:

It's so annoying.

CHELSEY DONN:

It happens to me with some regularity.

TREY GERRALD:

Anyone out there listening, help me understand in better terms than Google, what's the difference between C E and C E and why do I always get it wrong?

TREY GERRALD:

Thank you.

CHELSEY DONN:

Oh, Annoying, added to the ledger, Trey.

CHELSEY DONN:

That felt like a lot of math for the top of the show.

CHELSEY DONN:

Should we make some other calculations?

TREY GERRALD:

I'm ready, yeah, should we?

CHELSEY DONN:

All right, let's do it.

TREY GERRALD:

Let's do it!

VOICEOVER:

Review That Review,

CHELSEY DONN:

As your trusty Review Queens, we bring in internet reviews that we feel need to be inspected.

TREY GERRALD:

We're gonna read you a review, break it down together, rate the impact of that review on a scale from zero to five, crowns.

TREY GERRALD:

It's a very regal process, bursting the seams with regality, and we call

VOICEOVER:

Assess That Kvetch,

CHELSEY DONN:

That's right.

TREY GERRALD:

Chelsey, it's your week, baby.

TREY GERRALD:

So, what have you got?

CHELSEY DONN:

Well, it's June, you know, it's my birthday month, and I think you know this about me, Trey, but there's a couple things I like to do for my birthday every year as like traditions, if I can, God willing.

CHELSEY DONN:

Do you know

TREY GERRALD:

Let me guess.

TREY GERRALD:

You like to see a game.

TREY GERRALD:

You like to go to a sports arena.

CHELSEY DONN:

Which one do you know?

CHELSEY DONN:

It's good that you even knew that.

TREY GERRALD:

Well, I think it's like a baseball thing, right?

TREY GERRALD:

So, I'm guessing it's But you live in Los An The Dodgers.

TREY GERRALD:

Is

CHELSEY DONN:

yes, so I always go to a Dodgers game, and then I always

TREY GERRALD:

And you always go to I think it's in the hills, the, the, what is that park?

TREY GERRALD:

Griffith Park?

TREY GERRALD:

No.

TREY GERRALD:

Ajai?

CHELSEY DONN:

Oh, hi, I did that one year for my birthday, good memory,

TREY GERRALD:

Wait, you go, oh, to the Ren Fair?

CHELSEY DONN:

no, that's Morgan's birthday, but also good guess,

TREY GERRALD:

Wait, but you go up, so you go, oh, you go, oh, you go to, um,

TREY GERRALD:

upstate.

TREY GERRALD:

I don't know.

TREY GERRALD:

You go to Disney.

TREY GERRALD:

Oh, you love going to Disney.

CHELSEY DONN:

no,

TREY GERRALD:

Canada?

TREY GERRALD:

You go to

CHELSEY DONN:

I'll give you a hint, I'll give you a hint, it's in LA, and it's a

TREY GERRALD:

Oh, the Hollywood

CHELSEY DONN:

yes, Babe, good job, so I was realizing, Trey, we've never

CHELSEY DONN:

done a review of the Hollywood Bowl, Can you believe it, in all the years,

TREY GERRALD:

I've never been.

CHELSEY DONN:

You've never been!

TREY GERRALD:

No.

CHELSEY DONN:

We gotta go, Trey.

CHELSEY DONN:

It's imperative.

CHELSEY DONN:

I like I'm gonna make it actually one of my birthday goals that like within the year we go to a Hollywood Bowl show.

CHELSEY DONN:

We're gonna have to just make that happen.

CHELSEY DONN:

Anyway, this is the Hollywood Bowl.

CHELSEY DONN:

This is Yelp.

CHELSEY DONN:

This review was written by Rebecca H., who I would like to point out, is not an elite reviewer.

CHELSEY DONN:

No offense, Rebecca.

CHELSEY DONN:

All right, this is a five star review because I just couldn't.

CHELSEY DONN:

You know, I couldn't go low

TREY GERRALD:

go into the

CHELSEY DONN:

with my beloved.

CHELSEY DONN:

So this is Rebecca H's five star review of the Hollywood Bowl.

CHELSEY DONN:

I have been to the Hollywood Bowl dozens of times.

CHELSEY DONN:

Whether you enjoy your visit depends on the people you're seated with, and of course, the performance.

CHELSEY DONN:

I will give you some logistical tips to make your experience more enjoyable.

CHELSEY DONN:

For the love of Jesus.

CHELSEY DONN:

Take a park and ride bus or shuttle, round trip tickets are 5 online and 10 at the lot.

CHELSEY DONN:

Their website has information about all the lots in the Los Angeles area.

CHELSEY DONN:

The buses take you right up to the entrance after the show.

CHELSEY DONN:

You get on the bus and it leaves about 20 to 30 minutes after the end of the performance.

CHELSEY DONN:

So easy.

CHELSEY DONN:

Your stupid open picnic basket.

CHELSEY DONN:

May have been cute in the crate and barrel catalog, But you're gonna be hating life if you have to schlep that monstrosity up the stairs and through the aisles to your seat.

CHELSEY DONN:

I recommend a backpack with an ice pack in it.

CHELSEY DONN:

If you forget your corkscrew, don't worry, there will be thousands of corkscrews available for you to borrow.

CHELSEY DONN:

Don't pack that bag too tight, though.

CHELSEY DONN:

There's a security search upon entry.

CHELSEY DONN:

I guess they're looking for guns and severed heads because they sure don't care about alcohol.

CHELSEY DONN:

Bring an empty plastic bag with you to make trash disposal easier.

CHELSEY DONN:

Leave the glasses and flutes at home and use plastic cups.

CHELSEY DONN:

If you're seated in the benches, you can rent a cushion for 1.

CHELSEY DONN:

My behind has never been bothered by hardwood, but yours might be.

TREY GERRALD:

That's

CHELSEY DONN:

Hollywood Bowl, the more fun the people are.

CHELSEY DONN:

By the final row, people couldn't care less who's on stage, Pass the Vodka!,

TREY GERRALD:

funny.

CHELSEY DONN:

always bring a nice warm jacket, Temperatures drop dramatically once the sun dips behind the hills,

TREY GERRALD:

Oh, yes.

CHELSEY DONN:

My two fondest memories of the Bowl include, Getting drunk on a bottle of Riesling and crying, While Dolly Parton sang, Coat of Many Colors,

CHELSEY DONN:

Another time while the audience was waiting for a show to start.

CHELSEY DONN:

A hawk

CHELSEY DONN:

carrying a

TREY GERRALD:

No.

TREY GERRALD:

No!

CHELSEY DONN:

its talons swooped up the amphitheater, not three feet above the audience's heads.

CHELSEY DONN:

The collective gasp of horror was something I will never forget.

CHELSEY DONN:

The hawk.

CHELSEY DONN:

Must have told its hawk buddies in the trees.

CHELSEY DONN:

Hey, watch this.

TREY GERRALD:

What about the rat?

CHELSEY DONN:

I know, it took such a sad turn at the end.

TREY GERRALD:

Do you think it's dead?

CHELSEY DONN:

I mean, I think once it's in the talons.

TREY GERRALD:

Wow, well,

TREY GERRALD:

otherwise, I

CHELSEY DONN:

like a moment of silence for the cat?

TREY GERRALD:

I would like to

CHELSEY DONN:

Okay, uh, let's just

TREY GERRALD:

I do think that that is, you know, it is nature.

TREY GERRALD:

That's part of life.

TREY GERRALD:

Everyone knows.

CHELSEY DONN:

I I I It's a joke.

CHELSEY DONN:

It's a joke.

CHELSEY DONN:

I mean, it's not a joke.

CHELSEY DONN:

It I believe that it really happened, but I feel like the reason for including it.

CHELSEY DONN:

I want you to talk about why you think Rebecca included that.

TREY GERRALD:

That's a good question.

TREY GERRALD:

I mean, I guess maybe she's, Playing it up as a little bit of humorous and we went very dark with it.

TREY GERRALD:

But it's very clear that Rebecca, I think Rebecca should be an elite.

TREY GERRALD:

I don't know their

TREY GERRALD:

number of reviews.

TREY GERRALD:

I don't know.

TREY GERRALD:

This is maybe one of the most helpful reviews we've ever covered on the,

CHELSEY DONN:

I'm actually agree.

CHELSEY DONN:

And I'm actually sort of shocked that they're not because they've written at this point 244 reviews.

CHELSEY DONN:

Well, no.

CHELSEY DONN:

Yep.

CHELSEY DONN:

244

TREY GERRALD:

there pictures,

CHELSEY DONN:

shocked that they're not because they've written at this point 244 reviews and 114 photos.

TREY GERRALD:

but is there a picture on this?

CHELSEY DONN:

No pictures on this.

TREY GERRALD:

I wish that if Rebecca had attached a picture,

TREY GERRALD:

like a shitty zoomed in picture of Dolly

CHELSEY DONN:

of Dolly Parton.

TREY GERRALD:

have aced it.

CHELSEY DONN:

Yeah,

TREY GERRALD:

She's still kind of acing,

CHELSEY DONN:

she's slaying in my opinion.

TREY GERRALD:

I thought it was so funny because something to clarify here is that I don't really know what the Hollywood Bowl is but I do know that they went there on the first season of The Girls Next Door and I also know that lots of Broadway shows will be performed at the

TREY GERRALD:

Hollywood Bowl by like

CHELSEY DONN:

a lot.

CHELSEY DONN:

They're so fun.

CHELSEY DONN:

Yeah,

TREY GERRALD:

but now hearing that Dolly Parton is there I'm assuming it's just an outdoor music venue like did Beyonce play the Hollywood Bowl or is it not big enough?

CHELSEY DONN:

maybe in like 30 years like a lot of like older like

CHELSEY DONN:

You know what I mean?

CHELSEY DONN:

Like I've seen Diana Ross,

CHELSEY DONN:

you know what I'm saying?

CHELSEY DONN:

I mean, not that you have to be old.

CHELSEY DONN:

I mean, you could also see, like, Fish plays at the Hollywood Bowl.

CHELSEY DONN:

Dave Matthews will play the Hollywood Bowl.

CHELSEY DONN:

I've seen so many performers.

CHELSEY DONN:

I've seen Stevie Wonder at the Hollywood Bowl.

CHELSEY DONN:

I

TREY GERRALD:

And then it's like, Hairspray, the

CHELSEY DONN:

then also it's Hairspray the Musical, and then also it's Tchaikovsky, and then also it's Pixar Night.

CHELSEY DONN:

It's all about the, the sound quality at the Hollywood Bowl.

CHELSEY DONN:

The amphitheater is insane.

TREY GERRALD:

Right.

TREY GERRALD:

So it is an amphitheater.

CHELSEY DONN:

Yes, and an outdoor amphitheater, and then nine times out of ten, the orchestra will join.

CHELSEY DONN:

So if it's like that artist, they're being filled in by the philharmonic, which

TREY GERRALD:

Oh, that's cool.

CHELSEY DONN:

stunning, and it's a spectacle for sure.

CHELSEY DONN:

My favorite thing is that you have to be out of there by 11.

TREY GERRALD:

Ooh, that's

CHELSEY DONN:

I think you would like that too.

CHELSEY DONN:

Isn't that a great role?

CHELSEY DONN:

Because it's the show's always the perfect one.

TREY GERRALD:

Well, you know Madonna would never play there because she's notoriously two hours late.

CHELSEY DONN:

Yes.

CHELSEY DONN:

No, no, you can't.

CHELSEY DONN:

You're starting on time.

TREY GERRALD:

Wait, there is one of the most thrilling YouTube videos,

TREY GERRALD:

this is a Deep cut.

TREY GERRALD:

of when they did a chorus line at the Hollywood Bowl of Mara Davi singing.

TREY GERRALD:

What is that song?

TREY GERRALD:

At the Ballet!

CHELSEY DONN:

At the

TREY GERRALD:

At the ballet.

TREY GERRALD:

At the Ballet!

TREY GERRALD:

At the Ballet!

TREY GERRALD:

is the most thrilling.

TREY GERRALD:

Listeners, if you're driving, pull over.

TREY GERRALD:

Literally Google Mara, M A R A, Davi, D A V I, At the Ballet, Hollywood Bowl.

TREY GERRALD:

Your body will

CHELSEY DONN:

Pause this and then come back.

CHELSEY DONN:

Let us know what you think.

CHELSEY DONN:

1 850 REVIEW ZERO.

TREY GERRALD:

that long tangent to say I

TREY GERRALD:

thought it was very humorous up top to say your experience will depend on whatever it is that you're seeing.

TREY GERRALD:

So that makes more sense.

TREY GERRALD:

And also who you're seated with, which

TREY GERRALD:

I thought was very funny because notoriously, I have ruined a couple of Broadway shows for David, because if

TREY GERRALD:

I'm not into something, I can really, really not Be a good person.

TREY GERRALD:

And then I also thought it was a funny turn to say for the love of Jesus.

TREY GERRALD:

That, that clued me in that she's taking us on a humorous path,

TREY GERRALD:

because obviously the phrase is for the love of God.

TREY GERRALD:

You're twisting my ear a little bit and

CHELSEY DONN:

Yes.

TREY GERRALD:

thought, kudos to you, Rebecca.

TREY GERRALD:

Oh, when was this written?

TREY GERRALD:

What year?

CHELSEY DONN:

I was looking at just five stars, admittedly.

CHELSEY DONN:

It was written in July of 2012.

TREY GERRALD:

Okay.

TREY GERRALD:

Cause I can guarantee you these park and rides are probably at least double the price

CHELSEY DONN:

Not really.

CHELSEY DONN:

Like they're still pretty cheap and it's still the way to go.

TREY GERRALD:

So that blew my mind.

TREY GERRALD:

That whole, cause it would have never occurred to me.

CHELSEY DONN:

I mean, she is giving you the insider tips.

CHELSEY DONN:

Like some of these tips, I just want to say as a quick side note without like too much insider baseball, I had to like learn the long way.

CHELSEY DONN:

Like, I figured all this stuff out, but, like, not on the first try.

CHELSEY DONN:

So, Rebecca's really giving you, like, the hot tea.

CHELSEY DONN:

Like, even the backpack was, I was like, genius.

CHELSEY DONN:

Like, I've never done that, and the end of the night, I'm always like, Oh my God, I'm schlepping.

CHELSEY DONN:

Just so you listeners and you Trey know, The Hollywood Bowl is unique because you can bring alcohol in.

TREY GERRALD:

So that was my next point.

TREY GERRALD:

Yes.

TREY GERRALD:

Keep

CHELSEY DONN:

You could bring food in.

CHELSEY DONN:

So a lot of people will go super early, like two hours early, you bring a whole like picnic setup, you bring alcohol, you bring whatever you want and you watch this show outside and it's gorgeous.

CHELSEY DONN:

At first, like during the light, you can see the Hollywood sign and you're like noshing, you're noshing at your bench seat while you're watching in this amazing amphitheater and then this light, the sun goes down and like, oh, it's a magical place, but there's a lot of great tips here.

TREY GERRALD:

Well, you're wrong about one thing.

TREY GERRALD:

You can't bring anything because they must be looking for severed heads.

CHELSEY DONN:

Right.

CHELSEY DONN:

You cannot bring guns, you do, but that makes me feel safer.

CHELSEY DONN:

There's like a pretty serious like metal detector and they're looking through your bags.

CHELSEY DONN:

And like Rebecca says, they're not looking at first.

CHELSEY DONN:

I was like, Oh no, is this bad?

CHELSEY DONN:

Like I have like wine or something.

TREY GERRALD:

Well, that's what I was.

TREY GERRALD:

Yes,

TREY GERRALD:

very valuable.

CHELSEY DONN:

But then it was like, no, they're not looking for that.

CHELSEY DONN:

They're looking to like make, keep us safe.

TREY GERRALD:

I wonder if Rebecca has a TikTok now because all of this could be like nine TikToks, like of hacks, like

TREY GERRALD:

bringing your own trash bag.

TREY GERRALD:

So you don't have to like,

TREY GERRALD:

I mean, queen.

CHELSEY DONN:

queen.

CHELSEY DONN:

She's a queen.

CHELSEY DONN:

She's

TREY GERRALD:

Also, her behind has always loved hardwood.

TREY GERRALD:

Hilarious.

CHELSEY DONN:

But that's also like a great tip, like yeah, for like a dollar, I think it's still like a dollar, you can get a cushion,

TREY GERRALD:

it's your renting

CHELSEY DONN:

you're renting it, and then at the end of the show, you just leave it there, and they come and collect it,

TREY GERRALD:

Also, the whole Crate and Barrel picnic basket.

TREY GERRALD:

God, I love Crate and Barrel.

CHELSEY DONN:

I love Crate

TREY GERRALD:

is such a dreamy store.

TREY GERRALD:

I love.

TREY GERRALD:

And then the last little piece here, the more fun people are, the higher up you go, which seems just so funny to

CHELSEY DONN:

and it's also like a good point just about the venue in general, cause that's another thing is, you could sit anywhere,

TREY GERRALD:

Oh, it's not?

TREY GERRALD:

It's just general omission?

CHELSEY DONN:

No, no, no, you can't, sorry, you can buy the cheap seats.

CHELSEY DONN:

It's not like in other situations where you buy the cheap seats and you're like, oh shit, I'm in the cheap seats.

CHELSEY DONN:

It's a gorgeous view from wherever you are and the higher up you are, you're probably more likely to run into people that are like, I just bought these last minute, oh my god, I'm so excited to be here.

CHELSEY DONN:

Like, that's the vibe.

CHELSEY DONN:

Let's have a good time.

TREY GERRALD:

Because what I'm hearing is that the Hollywood Bowl is an institution in itself, so regardless, which Rebecca mentions in the very top, and you also mentioned, the variety of acts that they book,

CHELSEY DONN:

yeah,

TREY GERRALD:

You can go for the experience and just be like, well, I don't really know much about fish, but

TREY GERRALD:

like I know it'll be a colorful crowd.

CHELSEY DONN:

Exactly.

CHELSEY DONN:

Like I don't even like fish.

CHELSEY DONN:

I got invited to a concert for free and like, I loved that concert.

CHELSEY DONN:

Like it was so fun.

TREY GERRALD:

Also, just, um, for a personal reason, if, if my husband, David Perlman is listening, Rebecca points out that once it gets later in the day, it gets colder.

TREY GERRALD:

Just all,

TREY GERRALD:

all I'm going to say, that's

CHELSEY DONN:

Oh, that's a side thing for you guys.

CHELSEY DONN:

It gets like actually very cold when the

TREY GERRALD:

Would you say that it always gets colder?

TREY GERRALD:

Or would you say it generally gets colder?

TREY GERRALD:

Choose wisely.

CHELSEY DONN:

I have a very definitive opinion on this and you know that I'm usually on your side, but I'm sensing that on this, I'm on Trey's.

CHELSEY DONN:

100 percent of the time the temperature drops when the sun goes down.

CHELSEY DONN:

This is a scientific fact.

TREY GERRALD:

Thank you.

TREY GERRALD:

Alright, well, I mean, we've really gone through a bunch of these points here because it's exceedingly valuable.

TREY GERRALD:

It's like, valuable.

TREY GERRALD:

It's like, dripping with

CHELSEY DONN:

It's dripping with value.

CHELSEY DONN:

Like, like really good value.

TREY GERRALD:

And it's like, as diverse as the booking schedule at the Hollywood Bowl.

TREY GERRALD:

It's like, Do the park and ride, bring a trash bag for yourself, you can have alcohol, don't bring glass, don't be silly, bring some plastic cups, if you forget a corkscrew, don't let it ruin

TREY GERRALD:

the night, there's 800 million in the venue.

TREY GERRALD:

What about the spelling grammar?

CHELSEY DONN:

Great.

CHELSEY DONN:

Intentional.

CHELSEY DONN:

Spell check.

TREY GERRALD:

Okay, good.

CHELSEY DONN:

Is it shady?

CHELSEY DONN:

I mean, obviously it's

TREY GERRALD:

for the cat,

CHELSEY DONN:

The cat.

CHELSEY DONN:

I mean, I do want to just point out because I was like listening to a previous episode of ours that aired and you said this and I'm like, I think it's important for us to say, you know, sometimes these things sound more serious when we're reading them out loud versus when you're just reading it on the page.

CHELSEY DONN:

I think that's an important

TREY GERRALD:

oh that's interesting.

CHELSEY DONN:

I don't really want to ding Rebecca too much for that because I think hearing out loud like this cat and this thing, it feels very like, whoa.

CHELSEY DONN:

But when you're looking at the review itself, it's such a like small end thing.

CHELSEY DONN:

And it's clear that they're like, this was a crazy thing that we're seeing that obviously you're going to remember forever.

CHELSEY DONN:

So I do think things sound harsher.

TREY GERRALD:

For sure, and the

TREY GERRALD:

sentence right before this is crying at Dolly Parton drunk on Riesling.

CHELSEY DONN:

Yes, exactly.

CHELSEY DONN:

You said ew and I thought ew.

CHELSEY DONN:

I cannot with the Riesling.

CHELSEY DONN:

It's like a hangover guarantee.

TREY GERRALD:

Like, yeah, any sort of wine, hang on, like, drunk feels a

CHELSEY DONN:

I love a champagne drunk.

CHELSEY DONN:

Don't get me wrong.

TREY GERRALD:

you literally just took that out of my mouth, cause,

TREY GERRALD:

no, no.

TREY GERRALD:

The only thing worse than wine drunk is champagne drunk, for me,

TREY GERRALD:

in my opinion, Because?

TREY GERRALD:

I'll always get a headache.

CHELSEY DONN:

Maybe, I mean, I get headaches a lot, so I guess I should pay attention, but I just enjoy the drunk of it.

CHELSEY DONN:

Like a champagne drunk is

TREY GERRALD:

Oh, that's really interesting.

TREY GERRALD:

That, I'm glad you say that, because it is so repulsive to me.

TREY GERRALD:

Like,

TREY GERRALD:

this is actually not being funny.

TREY GERRALD:

When people are drinking champagne, I lose sight of people have different opinions in the world, because it's such a turn off for my

CHELSEY DONN:

Shut up.

CHELSEY DONN:

Really?

TREY GERRALD:

be, uh, you know, Chemical thing in my body, but it is so unpleasant

TREY GERRALD:

and it happens so quickly that even when we get like a free complimentary champagne or something at dinner, like I'll take two sips and be done because it gives me a headache.

TREY GERRALD:

I get drunk really fast and it doesn't last as long.

TREY GERRALD:

So that's for me, my body

CHELSEY DONN:

Yeah.

CHELSEY DONN:

That must just be the way you react.

TREY GERRALD:

you really just pointed that out to me because.

CHELSEY DONN:

interesting.

TREY GERRALD:

I have forgotten that not, it doesn't affect everyone the same way,

CHELSEY DONN:

So when we have our three year anniversary show next week, we're not going to be clinking champagne.

TREY GERRALD:

I don't think so,

CHELSEY DONN:

Okay, anyway, we got way off topic,

TREY GERRALD:

I could crown Rebecca, how do you feel?

CHELSEY DONN:

okay, I think we've talked about the impact, we've talked about the humor, let's jump into the crowning,

TREY GERRALD:

Alright, let's do it, So Chelsey and I each have our own set of zero to five crown cards, Now, in an effort to be fair and not influence one another, We're gonna simultaneously reveal our ratings,

VOICEOVER:

The Queens are tabulating, Total Score,

CHELSEY DONN:

you're joking me,

TREY GERRALD:

I'm joking you,

CHELSEY DONN:

Trey and I have made Rebecca an official Review Queen squared, Rebecca, you did it, that is a feat that not many people on this show have accomplished, you got a free t shirt, because you got a double Review Queen, I want to hear, What you thought about Rebecca Trey, why you gave her five crowns, let us know.

TREY GERRALD:

So I was holding up one crown just

TREY GERRALD:

to goose Chelsey a little bit.

TREY GERRALD:

I mean we really went over it and I just think like it's probably the most singularly useful review we've covered in 158 episodes.

CHELSEY DONN:

that's quite a statement.

TREY GERRALD:

It's done with a lot of humor, it's done with brevity, and I just feel like Rebecca's a good time gal, and I want to be friends with her, I want to go see Dolly Parton there with her, and you, Chelsey.

TREY GERRALD:

You know, the, the, I was sort of like, I

TREY GERRALD:

don't know, like, I agree, I think the cat thing is meant as humor, and also, if she had included a blurry, Zoomed in photo of Dolly Parton, like, pixelated because she was all the way in the back.

TREY GERRALD:

That would have been, like, chef's kiss, like, really funny.

TREY GERRALD:

But it didn't even need it, because it's so strong and it's valuable, and I love the whole bus and the trash bags and reading Crate and Barrel, like, hilarious.

TREY GERRALD:

So, five stars, five crowns, Review Queen.

TREY GERRALD:

Chelsey, why did you do Review Queen?

CHELSEY DONN:

just think it's obvious, like we said, Rebecca H is the queen, I would love to go to the bowl with Rebecca H anytime, They know all the tricks of the trade,

CHELSEY DONN:

I think they could even teach me a thing or two, They get to the point, they give lots of great information, and frankly, They're a queen.

CHELSEY DONN:

Thank you, Rebecca, for writing such a lovely review of one of my favorite places in LA, if not my favorite place in LA.

CHELSEY DONN:

I appreciate the review and I appreciate you, Review Queen.

CHELSEY DONN:

Thank you.

CHELSEY DONN:

Thank you.

TREY GERRALD:

And we got you nine years later, baby.

CHELSEY DONN:

We, we, it took us a little while to get you.

CHELSEY DONN:

It's actually 12 years.

CHELSEY DONN:

It took us a while to get you, but we got you.

CHELSEY DONN:

Yes, that was fun.

TREY GERRALD:

Yay!

CHELSEY DONN:

Yeah, I like that.

CHELSEY DONN:

All right, my queen, we've done it.

CHELSEY DONN:

We have reached the most regal portion of our show, of our two Review Queen show.

CHELSEY DONN:

Who are you inducting for?

VOICEOVER:

My Royal Highness,

TREY GERRALD:

Okay, today I'm gonna be a little bit like Rebecca

TREY GERRALD:

and I'm gonna joyfully induct something and then it has a little bit of darkness.

TREY GERRALD:

So

TREY GERRALD:

I want to induct yearbooks and the

TREY GERRALD:

reason I want to induct yearbooks because I was the fourth graduating class of my high school and they negotiated a deal for three years and then somehow It didn't get renegotiated or something so my senior year we didn't have a yearbook except we all banded together to have like Kinko's print us literal paper and it was like literally like one of those black plastic bindings that had a clear sheet of paper on the top and Bullshit, but I just love yearbooks.

TREY GERRALD:

It's like now everything is so digital that it's sort of like literally there's an app to tell my I don't even need the app.

TREY GERRALD:

It's like my photos will tell me this is what you did nine years

TREY GERRALD:

ago, but like there's something very sweet about like seeing how my mom dressed me in a red polo by accident for like nine years.

TREY GERRALD:

Like it's so

TREY GERRALD:

random and like Put that white mousse in my hair and like brushing my hair over to the side like and then like also like getting little glimpses of like These people in your life that are somehow imprinted in your mind.

TREY GERRALD:

It's like oh, I remember my second grade teacher But what the fuck was her name?

TREY GERRALD:

I don't remember I can like see where my desk was in the classroom and it's like oh my gosh that girl She sat beside me, and I would cheat off of her on te Like, all of

TREY GERRALD:

those little things that happen, And I'm wondering, like, schools must still do yearbooks, Cause it's like, so sentimental and such, But like, I'm also hearing, like, everything is documented, So, maybe the value of yearbooks is a little lesser for Gen Z ers, But I don't know, I'm I could be making that up, but They're very sweet to me, and um, it's really insane that Kinko's made my yearbook, my senior year of high school, but that's the many reasons today why I am being like Rebecca H.

TREY GERRALD:

and honoring yearbooks with a silly and sort of dark undertone.

TREY GERRALD:

Yearbooks, you're my Royal Highness.

CHELSEY DONN:

I love that.

CHELSEY DONN:

Have you ever like pulled it out and read the messages that were written in there and then like, what the fuck was that?

TREY GERRALD:

that's, I forgot about that, yes, having people sign your yearbooks and all the

TREY GERRALD:

random inside jokes that

CHELSEY DONN:

And there's so many inside jokes that like, Even things that people are like, oh my God, it's the blah, blah, blah.

CHELSEY DONN:

That's the nickname.

CHELSEY DONN:

You gave me the curb star.

CHELSEY DONN:

And I'm like, I don't, I don't even remember that.

CHELSEY DONN:

Like, I guess I did that.

CHELSEY DONN:

That sounds like something I might have done, you know?

TREY GERRALD:

I know, it's so sweet, thank

TREY GERRALD:

you, that's like so much the key of yearbooks, I forgot.

CHELSEY DONN:

Ugh.

CHELSEY DONN:

The

TREY GERRALD:

It's also crazy to me when I think about like, when people become very famous, and like, they're like in your yearbook, or,

CHELSEY DONN:

Oh yeah.

TREY GERRALD:

when you like, went to school with Jeffrey Dahmer, and he's like in your yearbook,

CHELSEY DONN:

I love it.

CHELSEY DONN:

When somebody that you weren't really expecting in high school has some sort of

TREY GERRALD:

glow up,

CHELSEY DONN:

Yeah, glow up, and you're just like, wow, that's so cool, like, and so interesting that sometimes, like, the top, the valedictorian, you're like, oh, that's an interesting choice.

TREY GERRALD:

Also, I remember my mom, for whatever reason, always saying, Be nice to the nerds, because they're gonna be the most successful, And all of the jocks will be fat when you're 40.

TREY GERRALD:

And I was like,

TREY GERRALD:

I

TREY GERRALD:

was like, What?

TREY GERRALD:

Why are

CHELSEY DONN:

love that your mom said that.

CHELSEY DONN:

That's so cool.

TREY GERRALD:

But I look back, and it's fair to all of the popular jockey kids, like, Have very, um, routine lives.

TREY GERRALD:

Like, they live the lives that their parents lived.

TREY GERRALD:

You know, this is a grand overstatement, but

TREY GERRALD:

like, It's very interesting to see.

TREY GERRALD:

They all have kids, and they, I'm sure, are very happy, and I, I wish them the best, but

TREY GERRALD:

it's not how I perceived life at that age.

TREY GERRALD:

Anyway, there we

CHELSEY DONN:

Small quick tangent that I just want to talk about and address quickly, quickly, quickly.

CHELSEY DONN:

Speaking of nerds, Trey, you did me dirty on the editing of the episode.

CHELSEY DONN:

You really, I don't know if you guys will listen, it's several episodes back at this

TREY GERRALD:

hmm.

TREY GERRALD:

Calc It's the Calculator

TREY GERRALD:

episode!

CHELSEY DONN:

the calculator episode, ironically, because Trey was complaining about the calculator at the top of the episode, but he asked me my opinion of this watch, and I, of the calculator watch, and I was like, it's sort of this nerdy thing that like, you know, was like popular amongst nerds, and if you had it, you were like the king of the nerds, and it was like a quick, thing that I just said but I didn't know that Trey had it and Trey edited me saying nerd and king of the nerds and all that in such a like funny way that made it like really really stand out so if you haven't listened to that episode yet hop back and listen to it because Trey really did his editing best with that one but I kind of took the butt of the the joke there but that's okay I'm fine with it

TREY GERRALD:

It's funny because I'm going to do it even dirtier because I'm about a

CHELSEY DONN:

no.

TREY GERRALD:

I send to Chelsey the episode the minute I finish it, so she didn't hear it until it went live, which is the funniest part, but also I, it was such an opportunity because I'm like, what did you think of these?

TREY GERRALD:

And you're like, I'm a nerd, like you go into this whole thing and then you're like,

TREY GERRALD:

why, what did you think of it?

TREY GERRALD:

And I was like, Well, I was obsessed with it, so I had to, I had to inflate it

CHELSEY DONN:

Oh, my God.

CHELSEY DONN:

It was funny.

CHELSEY DONN:

It was funny.

TREY GERRALD:

Alright, well, we did a queen, that's another round on the R U A R Q Ferris Wheel of Dolly Parton making me cry because I'm not even drunk on Riesling and

TREY GERRALD:

creative

CHELSEY DONN:

got the cat.

CHELSEY DONN:

Thank you for joining us today.

CHELSEY DONN:

If you like what you heard, please tell a friend.

TREY GERRALD:

If you did not like what you heard, please tell an enemy.

TREY GERRALD:

On this week's after show, Chelsey and I are going to be rating and reviewing a one star Amazon review for a retro 1951 tornado rollerball pen, and the color's kiwi, just keep that in mind.

CHELSEY DONN:

Oh, okay.

CHELSEY DONN:

I wonder why this was said.

CHELSEY DONN:

She calls on like a couple people and they're like kind of shit in the

VOICEOVER:

What is your name?

VOICEOVER:

Michelle.

VOICEOVER:

Michelle, okay.

VOICEOVER:

Do you know the song, For Good?

VOICEOVER:

No, I do not.

VOICEOVER:

And she just lost the role.

CHELSEY DONN:

The third girl is this person and she's like, you seem cool.

CHELSEY DONN:

Do you know for good?

CHELSEY DONN:

And she's like, yes, I know for good.

CHELSEY DONN:

I love it.

CHELSEY DONN:

It's my favorite song or whatever.

CHELSEY DONN:

And she's like, all right.

CHELSEY DONN:

Her name's Sarah Hornsby.

CHELSEY DONN:

All right,

CHELSEY DONN:

Sarah,

VOICEOVER:

on, Sarah, get up here.

VOICEOVER:

Learn the song, Michelle, and you can get up there and do it.

CHELSEY DONN:

doing crowd work.

TREY GERRALD:

Hmm, me too, I'm full of wonder, of wonders, miracle of miracles.

CHELSEY DONN:

Wonder of wonders, miracle of miracles.

TREY GERRALD:

Now, please, we implore you to remember

CHELSEY DONN:

Ignore the haters.

CHELSEY DONN:

You're a queen!

TREY GERRALD:

gender nonspecific queen.

CHELSEY DONN:

Bye!

TREY GERRALD:

My,

VOICEOVER:

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VOICEOVER:

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VOICEOVER:

Follow us on all the socials at the review queens and join our mailing list@reviewthatreview.com.

VOICEOVER:

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VOICEOVER:

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VOICEOVER:

Give us a al now.

TREY GERRALD:

you weren't really upset about the edit, were you?

CHELSEY DONN:

Oh, no, I wasn't really upset.

CHELSEY DONN:

I was just like, oh my God, I feel bad because I, I love the nerds.

CHELSEY DONN:

I want to marry a nerd.

CHELSEY DONN:

Like, I'm all about the

TREY GERRALD:

Do you think if I was really upset, I would've been.

TREY GERRALD:

Do you think I would really have been upset by that?

CHELSEY DONN:

no, I'm just saying if there are any nerds listening to our podcast, I'm single and available.

TREY GERRALD:

oh, that's clear.

TREY GERRALD:

Okay, good.

TREY GERRALD:

Wait, what were you gonna say?

CHELSEY DONN:

I was just gonna say I have a Hollywood Bowl story I'll share in the after show and I want to hear like one of your favorite live concert stories.

CHELSEY DONN:

So,

TREY GERRALD:

Short list

CHELSEY DONN:

Friday.

TREY GERRALD:

My queens.

About the Podcast

Show artwork for Review That Review with Chelsey and Trey
Review That Review with Chelsey and Trey
A comedy podcast rating reviewing, and hilariously dissecting online reviews, uncovering the outrageous stories behind the stars.

About your hosts

Profile picture for Trey Gerrald

Trey Gerrald

Actor | Writer | Human-Person
Review Queen 👑
Profile picture for Chelsey Donn

Chelsey Donn

Actress | Comedian | Writer
Review Queen 👑